Breathing Underwater by Alex Flinn: Book Reflection

Breathing Underwater is novel that talks about 16-year old Nick Andreas who has beaten his girlfriend Caitlin, and he has been sentenced by a court to six months of counseling classes on family violence and dealing with anger, and he also has to keep a journal of his reflections on his relationship.  The judge also grants a restraining order so that he can`t have any contact with Caitlin.  At first Nick doesn´t understand why his behavior was wrong or what caused it, but by his reflection and his relationships with the other guys in the class, he learns his lesson and finally understands the roots off his problem. He also turns around his relationship with his abusive and violent father. 

         The novel mixes together Nick’s narration of his current life, after going to court, with his “journal entries” reflecting on his relationship with Caitlin and the events that led up to him beating her. You can soon see how he was copying his father`s controlling attitude, how insecure and jealous he was, and how he was aggravated by Caitlin having or even showing independent thought. Throughout the novel you realize how Nick puts all off his anger and insecurities towards Caitlin because he can`t stand up to his father. In the end Nick understands what he did wrong and that his father’s abusive behavior is not his fault. He finally stands up to him and puts an end to the cycle.

When I first started reading this book I didn´t think I would like it because it is not the kind of book I usually read. I soon surprised myself when I couldn´t put the book down. This book reminded me of many movies I`ve seen and stories I`ve heard were someone in the relationship is controlling and aggressive because of their own insecurities. Its also reminds me of the short story “Nobody Stole Jason Grayson” because in the story the main character`s relationships at home affect her relationships with everyone else, also both of the main characters, in this book and in the short story, have been abandoned by their mothers. I liked the way the author tells the story from Nick’s point of view because stories about domestic violence are usually told in the point of view of the abused. This book really made me see what a vicious cycle abusive relationships really are because when someone abuses of someone else it causes them to have low self-steam and become controlling and abusive towards somebody else, Nick´s feather`s abusive behavior causes Nick to become abusive toward Caitlin.

In my opinion one of the most important quotes in this book is:

“Like your life`s a big act. Like you are trying to be a man when you´re just a scared kid, trying to keep control when you really want o scream, cry, maybe hit someone. Ever feel like your breathing under water, and you have to stop because you`re gulping in to much fluid?”  (20)

I think this quote is so important because it describes exactly what Nick was feeling. The quote also contains the title of the novel, Breathing Underwater; to me this phrase means that you means that you are drowning in your problems, that they are taking over you or that you can`t fight back.

Another quote I find interesting is,

“It´s about being a man, a real man. Not just about who is bigger or stronger. It´s about doing the right thing even though you don´t want to, about taking responsibility for your actions… About letting go when you really want to hold on so bad” (253)

I liked this quote because I think it really sums up what the book is about and what Nick realizes in the end. It is also one of the main things that the author is trying to tell us. Another of the main things the author is trying to say is that you have to stand up for yourself and face your fears because that’s one of the only ways to grow and become a better person.

         What happens in this book is very realistic because it talks about and issue that many people are affected by. The book really changed my mind about abusive relationships because before I just thought that the person being abused was dumb for going back to the abuser or for even putting up with it but in this book you can really see what low self-steam both the victims and the abuser have and that even though what they do is very wrong they probably have other issues that are the roots of their abusive behavior and low self-steam.

         This book has become one of my favorite books because it is different than all the other books and it really opens your eyes to the world of domestic violence.